Quite possibly the grossest bathroom story ever
The title pretty much sums it up. If you have a weak stomach, stop reading here. I’m serious. What I witnessed isn’t for the faint of heart. And I swear to the Powers That Be, if I ever have to witness something like that again, I’m going to snap.
Up to the point that this event happened, it was a normal day at work. Reasonably slow, with a rush here and there. I was just finishing wiping down the sinks after the last rush when this woman came in. Mid- to late-twenties, pleasant-looking, probably European. She locked herself in a stall, and I didn’t pay much notice as I wiped down the mirrors. Eventually, I heard the plop, plop, plop of her taking a shit. Once again, I didn’t pay much mind. Until I realized that it sounded like the shit nuggets were falling from quite a height before they hit the water.
Worried, I glanced at the slit where the door meets the stall wall, and to my horror, caught a glimpse of the girl standing/hovering over the toilet.
The plopping stopped. There was three seconds of quiet before — quite literally — the shit hit the fan.
The most pleasant way I can describe the sounds that proceeded to come out of this girl, is that her asshole exploded. I’ve passed gas in my time that would shame a trucker. This girl was putting MY poots to shame, with that extra twist of liquid nastiness that only the worst indigestion can give you.
This went on for about ten minutes. Maybe more. And finally, it subsided. It had been a battle between her sphincter and the toilet, and I knew even before seeing the damage that the toilet was completely defeated.
I heard several flushes, then the girl emerged from the stall, pulling the door shut behind her. “Sorry…” she muttered, as she bashfully washed her hands and quickly skirted out of there. I watched her leave, and the stall suddenly grabbed my attention. I didn’t want to open that door, but I had to.
The damage was worse than I’d suspected.
The reddish-brown liquid was sprayed all over the toilet seat, back of the toilet, and the plumbing. It had looked like she’d made an attempt to wipe some of it away, but the attempt was poor. Several tissues floated in the toilet, and the empty pocket tissues plastic also floated around in there. Upon further inspection, the shit was dripping from the bottom of the toilet seat, it was all over the rim, the inside of the rim, and under, and it speckled the smooth walls of the bowl. The best part? It was on the walls and the floor, too.
It took me half an hour to clean, and I almost vomited on four separate occasions. There are very, very few odors in this world that elicit a gag reflex from me, and this was one of them. The smell was worse than baby shit. When I was done, I threw out my gloves, and scrubbed my hands and arms up to my elbows at LEAST 8 times. Glanced at the clean (but still haunting) stall, gagged one more time, and proclaimed to all the coworkers on my floor that I was done for the day.
June 4th, 2008 |
18 Comments
Holy. Shit. (no pun intended)
Ow, ew. Red shit? I think she should go to the doctor. I can’t even imagine this story in my mind…because it ends up looking like something on South Park.
Ew… I don’t get it. How do these people live with themselves. I often experience a blown up stomach at work, but wouldn’t dream of not wiping down everything till it bloody gleams after me.
Plus, the guys are ruthless. Every single time they exit the bathroom the act as if someone had pushed their heads into the toilet and made them smell it.
UGH! Sorry doesn’t cut it. She should clean up her own… s**t XP
That is gross to here. I suppose your job doesn’t supply protective masks that cover the mouth and nose to prevent you from inhaling really bad smells.
OMG! HAHA I feel so bad fore you, and I am glad to say that I am not you. That is utterly disgusting and I think if she would have planted her ass cheeks on the seat she wouldn’t have caused much damage! On the walls and on the floor it sounds like the exorcist of assholes! I would have definitely puked and told everyone that I needed to be sent home after that because I would be horribly sick.. especially if you work in the food service industry!
NASTY.
Jesus christ.. if I had a bad stomach I’d confine myself to my house until it passed. If that wasn’t possible, I sure as fuck wouldn’t hover over the god damned seat!
OH MY FUCKING GOD….. o_O
I wonder if she told herself at any point that should have a better chance getting it IN the toilet if she sat on it…
Holy shit……literally. That is quite possibly the grossest bathroom story I’ve heard and I am so, so sorry that you got stuck cleaning up the mess! If I, hypothetically lol, was that woman, I would not have left the stall in that kind of condition. That’s terrible.
eww, i have never seen a toilet like that. and red? seriously. what had she been eating? sick. i feel sorry for you. i don’t see how you’ll ever recover.
Oh wow, that is probably the most disgusting thing I have ever read. :S
WHY DO PEOPLE HOVER?!
Srsly. Public toilets are cleaner than the dirt and crap found under your fingernails.
People can be quite disgusting. I’ve learned that early on. I laughed about “poots” part. I’ve never heard that word in my life and it’s just one of those words that elicits giggles every time it’s read or said.
Seriously, though, she should go to the doctor. Red shit is not normal.
Oh my God. I didn’t read the warning bit at the start.
I’d rather sit and explode than do that in a public toilet! And to hover?! Does she think the seat isn’t clean enough for her? Jeez, hope you don’t get too many nightmares…
Oh, I forgot to mention…at least she washed her hands. XD
Geesh!!! You poor soul to have to clean up after that. It sounds like she must have downed a pound of jalopeno peppers beforehand to have had that type of result.
i hate public toilets.. i feel so sorry for you! Thats really disgusting… if it was me.. i wouldn’t have touched it.. would have thrown my job in before i had to clean something like that up.
p.s are we not affi’s anymore?
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